Into the Light From Behind Closed Doors: February 2015

Saturday, February 28, 2015

2 Years, 3 Months, 26 Days and 11 Hours (Part 5, The Conclusion)

Posted on 02/28/2015

Yokosuka, Japan, Naval Base, Day of Release, 1994

Four Marines rush into the room and I was sure I was about to go back to jail. The Commander waved them off and told them everything was okay. What a sigh of relief. "Lance Corporal Redditt, I can't begin to imagine what you went through and I know this is a lot being thrown at you right now, but this is the decision that was made." "Sir, I..." "Marine! Don't interrupt me. I'm not finished. I know you are upset now, but trust me, you will thank me later. If we discharge you now it would be a bad conduct discharge. And we don't have grounds for discharging you in that manner because you weren't convicted of a crime in America and the crimes in Japan were misdemeanors. So we have no grounds to discharge you, period." After about a hour I calmed down and I asked the Commander if I could at least go home on leave to see my son. "Lance Corporal Redditt, you and I both know if I allow you to go home on leave you won't come back. You would be AWOL and then you would get a dishonorable discharge. Lance Corporal, you have been through so much. And yes, this was a terrible experience, but why mess up the rest of your life by going AWOL? You may hate me now, but trust me, years down the line you will thank me." I didn't know it then, but those were some of the truest words ever spoken.

Palm Beach Gardens, FL, February 28, 2015

24 years later and some of the mental scars still remain. I still can't stand to hear people whistle. It actually drives me insane. It takes me back to every time Hitler, Stalin or Punk ass whistled. I heard a whistle and I knew an ass whooping was coming. Today, I have a lot of family members and friends that whistle. That leaves me with one mission, stop the whistling! I came up with a good method a few years ago on how to deal with it. Every time a person whistles, I engage them in conversation so that they would talk instead of whistle. It works 95 percent of the time. The other 5 percent? I find an excuse to leave! It's amazing that after so many years that still affects me. I still can't sleep in a room if the door isn't locked. I never sleep in a bedroom with the door being open. I still feel the need to be able to prepare myself if someone were to come in while I am sleeping. This used to drive my wife crazy. I have gotten better about letting people touch me. I am still an extreme germaphobe, but I am better about shaking hands and letting people touch me. My wife can even wake me up now by touching me, instead of calling my name repeatedly because I would freak out if she touched me to wake me. It is and has definitely been a process but the scars are healing.

Iwakuni & Yokosuka, Japan, 1994 & early 1995

I went back into the Marine Corps and I served my time in Iwakuni, Japan, doing the job that I was assigned to do. And I must say this, I did my job phenomenally well, perhaps better than anyone that had ever held that position before or after me. But I'll tell you what, it is unreal how God works. Three months after I was released from Prison, I stepped back inside the walls of the Yokosuka Prison to come face to face with Punk ass, Stalin and Hitler again. There is no other explanation other than, it had to be God....

To be continued in my book. Release date will be announced here first!

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

2 Years, 3 Months, 26 Days and 11 Hours (Part 4)

Posted on 02/17/2015

I dedicate this blog to Gunnery Sergeant Richard Mennifield.

Gunnery Sergeant Richard Mennifield is the single most important person I have met on this level of existence. I would not be the Sheldon Redditt, that I am today, had it not been for this man. I have been looking for this man since September of 2007. I searched and searched and searched and I never could find him. Part 4 was halfway written when I received word that Staff Sergeant Mennifield had passed in February of 2007. He made Gunnery Sergeant before he retired from the Marine Corps. The news of his passing hit me like a ton of bricks. I NEVER cry when people pass because I fully understand that is part of Life. We all will pass on to the next level of existence, but I believe that on the next level, we continue to exist. That being said, I took his passing really hard. This was the man who saved my life. This man totally changed my way of thinking. He ignited the spark in me. He helped me to begin to see and judge people for who they are and not for the color of their skin. You see, without Gunnery Sergeant Mennifield, there would be no Amy or Hayden because I hated white people at the time. My life would be totally different if I hadn't met this man. I know I am rambling but when I got the news of his passing, I had to rewrite Part 4. Truly one of my biggest regrets in life is that I never got a chance to see you again, to thank you for all that you did for me and let you know all that you meant to me. There is not enough time or paper to fully explain how much you meant to me, but I will try my best to honor you in my book.

Yokosuka, Japan 1994

Today is the big day! I am finally being released from this Japanese Prison. I made it. I am looking in the mirror shaving. Wow I really made it. I hardly recognize the man in the mirror. I think this is the first time I have really looked at myself. I am a fraction of the man I used to be, both physically and mentally. I have lost 120 pounds, aged about 15 years physically, as well as mentally. The tears come uncontrollably. All the beatings, all the days of being so hungry that I thought I would die, the mental abuse was about to be over. I get to go home today. I get to see my son Ryan soon. He is the only person that I care about anymore. Everyone else is dead to me. I am still filled with a lot of anger. I will be back on American soil real soon. I will kiss the ground when I get back. People can say what they want about America but I tell you what. People have no idea how fucked up it is in other countries. You have zero rights and you are guilty until proven innocent, not the other way around. These are my thoughts as I am waiting for The Marine Corps to pick me up. The Marine Corps arrived around 10:00 am to pick me up. I was never so happy to see another human being or two human beings in this case. I needed a moment to take it all in. This was my first time outside of this walls in over 2 years. The Marines had a ton of questions but I couldn't even talk. I think at that moment it really hit me what all I had gone through and that I had survived it. The mental scars would last for another 24 years but physically, I am FINALLY safe.

Palm Beach Gardens, FL, February 17th 2015

I'm sitting in my office as I'm writing and I am thanking God for not only keeping me throughout that experience but also that I am not in a mental institution. I now know that God was preparing me for that experience in advance. I became a vegetarian about 2 months before I went to prison and still am to this day. Becoming a vegetarian prior to my imprisonment, allowed me to have discipline when it came to food. But what if God had not prepared me for that? I would have surely starved to death. There were plenty of nights that I went to bed hungry because I knew that something was put in my food. I would have rather starved than to drink piss or even worse. I began to learn a lot about Religion and History prior to going in and that truly helped me. The one positive thing about being in there was that they would let you read. That was a LIFE SAVER.

Yokosuka, Japan, Day of Release, 1994

I am riding in the car with the two Marines that picked me up, just taking it all in. One Marine asked me, "Lance Corporal Redditt," I haven't heard that title in awhile. "Can I ask you just one question? Is it really as bad in there as they say it is?" "It is much much worse.", I tell him. "Imagine the worst thing you can imagine and multiply that by ten. That's how horrible it was in there." We arrive at base and I am immediately taken to the Commanding Officers' Office. "Lance Corporal Redditt", he began to say, "I understand that you have been through a terrible experience." "Sir, that is a understatement, but I just want to put this behind me and get back home. So what time is my flight leaving today to get me back to the United States?" His answer floored me. "Lance Corporal Redditt, you still owe The Marine Corps time. You see, you were only charged with misdemeanor charges, so you have to go back into the Marine Corps and not only serve the rest of your time, but you have to make up the time that you missed while you were locked up in the Japanese Prison." My heart dropped. I can't believe what I am hearing I know this mother..... didn't say what I think he just said. "EXCUSE ME, SIR! I know you are FUCKING kidding me right? I know damn well you are not telling me that after 2 years, 3 months, 26 days and 11 hours in a fucking hell hole, that you are telling me I can't go home." "Calm down Lance Corporal? Fuck calming down! You need to get me a fucking flight back to America right the fuck now! I can't believe that you would say some bullshit like that to me! After I have....." Four Marines rush into the room. In that moment, I knew I had really Fucked up.

To be Continued.....

Monday, February 9, 2015

2 Years, 3 Months, 26 Days and 11 Hours (Part 3)

Posted on 02/09/2015

"Man! This Jodeci CD is nice! "Forever My Lady" and "Stay" are my favorite cuts." I am talking to my boys; Parker, Heard and Yates. We are sitting in Heards' and I room, talking about our girlfriends. "I'm about to go call my girl right now", I remember Heard saying. Minutes later, I hear a knock on the door. Parker turned the music down so that I can answer the door. It was Staff Sergeant Minnifield. "What's going on Staff Sergeant? What did we do now?" The look on his face told me that something was seriously wrong. "Redditt, the Japanese have decided to charge you." WAIT WHAT? "Charge me for what? I didn't do shit!" "Redditt, they are charging you with leaving the scene of a crime, resisting arrest, attempted assault on a police officer and disorderly conduct." "You can't be serious Staff Sergeant." But the look on his face told it all. "Redditt, the Japanese also believe that you guys are a flight risk, so they want to take you guys into custody immediately." "How in the hell did a day of listening to music in my barracks turn into this?", I remember thinking. "The Marine Corps told the Japanese that we would take you into custody and that we would lock you up in our jail on Camp Hansen. So I'm gonna need you to pack up some things, so I can take you up to Camp Hansen to jail."

Yokosuka, Japan, sometime in 1994

Oh how my life has changed since that dreadful day. I am in Solitary Confinement again for 30 more glorious days. "This is it, God, I can't take it anymore. You say you answer prayers. So, why the fuck aren't you answering mine? I am sick of this bullshit! Either you answer my prayers or tonight I'm taking this fucking sheet and I'm hanging myself." These are my words, as I am sitting Indian style, facing and talking to the wall, the tears continue flowing down my face. One of the prisoners committed suicide yesterday and Punk ass thought it was funny. "Redditt San, when are we gonna find you hanging?", he says laughing. "You are a Bitch you know that? When I was whooping your ass you were screaming like a bitch but now you want to be tough in front of your goons?" Damn! I fall into his trap. The trap that I said I wouldn't fall into again. After the last 60 day stint, I decided that was it for me. But here I am again for 30 days for disrespecting Punk ass.

Okinawa, Japan, sometime in 1992

"1 year and 9 months of hard labor", the judge said. I stood there in shock as the judge was rambling on for what seem like hours. How the hell did 4 misdemeanor charges turn into almost 2 fucking years in prison? These same charges in the US would have been dropped or I would have got a pat on the wrist at most. Unfortunately we are in Japan and not America. So for our "crimes", I got 1 year and 9 months. My other buddy got 2 years for robbing the cab driver and my other two buddies didn't get charged at all, nor should they have. I truly believe that the Japanese offered the Americans a deal. I believe they said, "give us two and we will let two go.". But, that is my opinion. I have no proof of that. The Japanese police took my buddy and myself into custody immediately. As we arrive at the jail in Okinawa, the two investigators greet us. "I told you, you would pay. You are ours now." A right hook to the face. Damn! What a greeting. I'm here less than one minute and I'm already getting my ass whooped. I see why they say the life expectancy for an American is less than 6 months. "You were very disrespectful when we were interviewing you, Redditt San. I promise you, we will teach you some respect here."

Yokosuka, Japan, 1994

"Redditt San, your brother tried to visit you and we told him, "No!"." Punk ass begins to tell me, grinning from ear to ear. Unbeknownst to me at the time, my brother was stationed in Yokosuka, Japan, in the Navy. "Wow, my brother!", I thought. I almost forgot I had a brother or family for that matter. Let me back up and explain. You see, in Japan, you can't have personal visits and you can only write or receive 1 to 4 letters a month, depending on your behavior. Needless to say, I only ever received 5 letters the entire time I was locked up. So, I was disconnected from my family and friends. "Fuck him! I don't want to see him or any of them for that matter! I have been here for almost two fucking years and I haven't heard from them. Only one letter from my Mom, two from my sister and two from my step mom. So, they all can kiss my ass!" I am angry at the world at this point. "I just can't understand how everyone has forgotten about me. Ok no, no don't go there," I tell myself. "What is the goal? To get out of here alive! So we have no time to dwell on what is or isn't going on in the outside world. Stay focused. I miss my son so much! I haven't seen him in almost 3 years. He was 2 months the last time I saw him. Now he is...let's see. Wow! He just turned 3. I wonder what he looks like now. I wonder if he is..." "Redditt San!" My thoughts are interrupted by Punk ass. "You know you aren't gonna make it out of here alive, right? We are gonna wait until it's almost time for you to leave and than we are gonna kill you.", he breaks into laughter. Punk ass being Punk ass. He has being making these statements since I have been here. They don't even faze me anymore. Back to my thoughts, "if I stay focused and don't let him get to me, I will be out of here in about 5 months. 8 more days and I will be out of Solitary confinement." Yesterday Punk Ass really tried to test me by bringing a picture of my son to me and tearing it up right in my face. "Redditt San", he said, "you have mail! It's a picture of your son!" He stands there tearing it up, without even showing it to me. "This low down motherfucker! I haven't seen my son in almost 3 years! I wouldn't know him from Adam if I saw him and the one picture that I do receive...this devil rips it up in my face! Stay calm, Sheldon, this is only a test. I tell myself, I will not let him get to me.

5 months later....

Tomorrow is the big day. I am finally getting out of here. 2 years 3 months 26 days and 11 hours. I am finally free. I am going home!" Or so I thought... The bullshit that happens next..... To be continued....